so last week my friend from j-class was like so perceptive it made me ponder and think of how totally dorky i am... coversation went somewhat like this:

he was all like, you know ivy you've got alot to say but you dont talk alot,

and i was like yeah thats true.

and he was like why is that?

i was like iono, i'm like that.

he was all its like you care what people think huh?

and im like sure, thats it.

and he's like well and i talk a lot but i dont care what people think.

and i laughed at that because he was so right about me and i apologize for the valley accent in my typing, its late at night and i dont give a crap but yeah

if you know me and i know you, you see the real me, whatever that means... pretty much the unfiltered version of me

but when i first meet peoples i dont know how to act, because its like an act of getting to know what other people are thinking and expecting and trying to meet that expectation.

gah why do i bother, i shouldn't give a rat's ass about what anyone else thinks, i know i shouldnt. intellectually its easy... in reality its like old habits that die hard

early new years resolution, be more assertive and less shy, dont give a crap what other people think!